Thursday, 11 August 2016

Water Heater Challenges and the Divide of Labour

Over the last several months, our water heater has been going on intermittent strike.  A few years ago (the first time it happened) we called the service provider, the repairman showed us how to reset it and suggested we just do so when we had problems rather than calling.  As long as it was something which happened every few months, that was a good solution.

Lately, it's been shutting down every couple of days.  Which put me in a bit of a dilemma.

Dave and I usually set down who will be responsible for what around the house.  When a problem crops up, we decide which of us will deal with it.  (This usually ends up being me, due to Dave's discomfort with unfamiliar situations and social interactions.)  In this case, Dave agreed to contact the service provider to see about replacing the water heater or about how much it would cost to "buy out" our rental contract and replace it with one of those instant hot water units.

If I had been dealing with it, the calls would have been made 3 months ago.  However, I've learned it's too easy for me to take on the extra responsibility and then I start feeling resentful about being the only one doing the work.  So even though I'm not happy about how things are progressing, I keep my hands off.  I've since learned that this is a common complaint among spouses who have an Asperger's partner.  Since the partner is unlikely to pick up on the little social complaints, they may not realize that a situation is becoming critical.  Even direct communication may not be helpful as it is too easy to rationalize away someone else's feelings.

All that said, the call has finally been made and we should be receiving our new heater within the next few days.

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