I met yesterday with our representative from Developmental Services, which is the group which coordinates funding and programs for children once they hit 18. A lot of their waitlists are ridiculous (double digits with years) so I wanted to start talking about finding placements for Alex when he gets older.
Too bad, DSO wasn't on the same page. They won't accept an application for him until he's 16 and he won't go on any lists until he's 18. The worker was helpful and polite, going through different options so that I can be aware of what's out there, but apparently I'm already signed up for everything Alex qualifies for.
It's frustrating to be back in a "wait it out" situation. The worker did tell me that there are private options which we can pursue in terms of day programs and residential programs, and they will have shorter waiting lists but will be expensive.
Alex is going to be a challenge to place because of his relative intelligence and skill level, paired with a complete unwillingness to cooperate unless there's something in it which he wants. I've seen kids on the spectrum doing well in integrated classes despite substantial communication and comprehension problems, because they are socially aware enough to want to work with others. Alex has always gone his own way and he always will. All we can do is hope that he eventually wants certain things (like independence) enough to make him willing to do the work.