This is the first time the boys have had to deal with a death. We tried to prepare them for it, explaining that Isa was very sick and in a lot of pain. We gave them a chance to say goodbye.
Nathan goes back and forth between forgetting that she's gone and being upset. I'm not sure how much Alex truly understands about what I told him. This morning he's been edgy with lots of whining and complaining, which I suspect may be signs of stress.
We did a candlelight vigil for her last night, going through photos and telling stories about her. When we get her ashes back, we will have a funeral.
Perhaps this is a little elaborate for a family pet, but she was a big part of our lives and I wanted to reassure the boys that she isn't being forgotten. Often we don't want to talk about death or those who have passed, because it hurts. But to a child, it can seem even more scary that the person disappears and then no one wants to talk about it.
Part of it is selfish. I miss her. I've been with her for her entire life since she was born to a roommate's cat when I was in university. I was there when she was born and I was there when she took her last breath. I'm glad I was able to do that although it was very hard for me. She was a good friend and though I'm sad that she's not here, I'm glad that she's not in pain any more.