Wednesday, 18 December 2013

Toileting Backslide

Life is not a success-only journey.  It should be.  But it's not, for some cosmically unknown reason.

We were all very excited when my youngest made his toileting hat-trick, granting him unlimited screen time for all perpetuity.  But I knew that it was only one more step in the process.

We've now had a not-entirely-unexpected problem with backsliding.  This week has been marked more by failures than successes.  So the question now becomes: what do we do?

Up until this point, we've treated the occasional failure by pulling back on screen time privileges.  He fails to go in the toilet, he loses his screen time until he has a success, except for 20 minutes if he tries to go.  (He's also allowed the iPad in the bathroom which means he can stretch out his time if he wants.)

Now we're wondering if we should step back and make him have three successes in a row before he's allowed unlimited time again.  Just a little reminder of what the point of the whole exercise was, so to speak.

Everything can seem so stretched out for my family.  I know lots of parents who did toilet training in under a week.  Most in under a month.  We're working on a year at this point.  I tell myself it's not the amount of time that matters, it's getting to the goal.  But the truth is that the amount of time does matter: it's one of the reasons why special needs parents get so exhausted just trying to deal with ordinary challenges.

At the end of the day, the goal is what's important.  And taking long does not take away from my child's success.  It just makes it harder on his coaching staff.

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