Friday, 19 April 2013

Perplexing Party Protocols

We've run into something of a dilemma this week. 

I sent out our birthday party invitations to Nathan's class.  In the afternoon, I got a response from a parent that another child in the class is having a party on the same day at the same time and in the same place.  (We're using a local facility with multiple party rooms.)

It's a literal popularity contest as the children have to choose which classmate's party to attend.  A parent's worst party-related nightmare (especially one who was never one of the cool kids to begin with).

But it gets worse.  Nathan didn't receive an invitation to the other child's party.

Was it deliberate?  Did the invite fall out or get lost?  Is he the only child not invited?  The lack of answers is driving me more than a little crazy.  I keep going back and forth, wondering what I should do?

One parent suggested I get in touch with the other mother and arrange for it to be a joint party.  But if Nathan was deliberately not invited, I'm reluctant to do it.  I don't want to make it socially awkward and resentful.

On the other hand, I do not want my little boy sitting there and watching his classmates go to someone else's party.  I think of him sitting there in an empty room with balloons and streamers and it makes me want to curl up and cry.

The other option is to move the party but the timing is a challenge.  Move it to when?  I'd already arranged a bunch of stuff from the cake to having someone to take care of Alex.

I really honestly don't know what to do and I'm desperately afraid of tripping over social expectations here.

The only thing I'm certain of is that I don't want Nathan to be aware of any of this.  He does not need the anxiety. 

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